What I'd Want

This weekend has begun slow and dreary. I honestly don't think there could be a better way.

On my blog list is one called, "And I'm Not Lying." I can't exactly remember how I found it. I think it might have been from a friend who found some cool art or graffiti images on his page, but if that's right, I can't find them.

His "About" section reads as follows:

"Life for me, especially in New York, is this constant river of sensations that usually make absolutely no sense at all. It just blasts past, washing over me like a giant garden hose squirting from the hand of an indifferent God. Sometimes it knocks me flat, sometimes it bends me backwards, but most of all when I can get my head up above this constant river I can see how it sparkles in the sun, feel how it’s helping me grow.

"That squirting hose, the dirt, all the dandelions and blades of grass around me, they’re all stories. And as you well know, the best stories are fertilized with a pinch of some amazing shit that always starts with “And I am NOT lying.”

I haven't read much of his blog, but I went back a couple posts and found this (Daro's Wisdom). I really hope you take a look, it's not long.

First off in the clip, you got to love his grandmother. She seems like the type that you just could sit and talk to for hours.

Second, I really connected to his writing about losing close family. I've never lost anyone close to me, friend or family. Back when I was in maybe eight grade, I remember my parents leaving me and my brother at home. I don't know when it was that they started leaving us by ourselves, but it was well before then. But I thought after they left, Why did they worry so much before? I came to the conclusion that it was mostly out of worry for what could happen when they were gone. More than us getting into trouble, like there was much chance of that living in East Texas country, it was our safety.

Then I thought about something. What about their safety? There was a more likely chance that something would happen to THEM than to us. Ever since then, I've worried about my parents traveling. Who knows what might happen one day, all I do know is that I would be devastated. It's going to be rough when something happens to a grandparent, but I pray to God nothing ever happens to my parents.

Being 12 hours away at school where I only see them several times out of a year, I can start to worry, Will something happen before I see them again? I don't know how I could handle that. As cheesy as it sounds, I always tell my parents I love them before I hang up, sometimes multiple times. If something were to happen, at least I'd have that.

If you didn't read the post, he's talking with his grandma over supper. The phone rings, and somehow he knows it's his mom calling to tell him of the passing of his great-grandma. He puts it off, continuing to talk with his grandma, and after he finally calls back and gets the bad news, his 95-year-old grandma holds him silently for a while then says, "You'll always your grandmother's grandchild."

If something ever happened to my close family, that's what I'd want to hear.